Destination: Brunch

We drove, four across the backseat, hip bones assaulted by door handles, ribs assaulted by neighboring elbows, in hot pursuit of one of the single greatest outdoor brunch spots in the Bay Area. A quick jog over the Golden Gate and through Tiburon's winding hills and there it is: Sam's Anchor Cafe.

It's the perfect way to spend one of the no-longer rare, beautiful San Francisco days. Sam's patio looks out over the Tiburon Marina towards the city's glistening skyline and salt and pepper, house-filled hills. The patio is split into two sides, one with small tables and a bar, the other with larger tables for full service dining. The outdoor bar boasts a colorful list of refreshing morning cocktails, Pink Lemonade made with Skky, Mojitos, and Bloody Mary's to name a few. If you happen to
want your Bloody tailored to your neediness, a selection of booster ingredients are on a ledge below the bar: Tabasco, Worcestershire, pepper, horseradish and bountiful cups of limes, celery, olives and other salad items you might want to wander into the mix.

Anthony Bourdain has said that brunch is one of the least respectable, most sketchy meals that restaurants serve. All the new/bad staff get punished with brunch and the food is usually a nicely worded excuse for week-old leftovers. If Mr. Bourdain honestly thinks that his best selling books, two TV shows, and guest judging spot on Top Chef qualify him as a "person in the know" he's got another thing coming.

We were seated just shy of their brunch menu cut-off (2:00pm). Our waitress Theresa quickly brought over the chips and guacamole we ordered in haste as we were still in the act of sitting down. The ordering proceeded in the following way:

Jennifer: "Can I add vegetables to the crab and jack omelette?"
Waitress: "I'm new here, I'm not sure, I have to ask."
Jennifer: "Okay, well, if it's possible, I'll have that. If not I'll have the broccoli and artichoke frittata."
(Waitress leaves to ask then comes back)
Waitress: "They said they could do it. Who's next?"
Lyndsey: "Are the Ramos Fizzes good here?"
Waitress: "I'm not sure, I've never had it..."
Lyndsey: "Uh, okay. I guess I'll try it. And the Ahi tuna sandwich with salad."
Waitress: "Okay."
Mandy: "Can I get the chedder and bacon omelette but instead of bacon will they substitute chicken apple sausage?"
Waitress: "I'm not really sure. I'll go ask."
(Waitress leaves to ask then comes back)
Waitress: "They said they could do it."
Mandy: "Great. I'll have that. And a...hmmm...am I ready for a drink yet? Yeah, okay. A mimosa, please."

It took close to six minutes for the six of us to order. (Mr. Bourdain, you know nothing about the kind of staff they put on the brunch shift.) In spite of her newness, Theresa worked it all out and each of the dishes showed up looking fabulous and tasting awesome. I enjoyed my dungeness crab benedict tremendously. The eggs were poached nicely and sat quaintly atop two beautiful crab cakes. When I got my fork in there the rivulets of running yolk cascading through the exposed pieces of crab meat made me beam. (This was particularly heartening after Citrone's notable crab cake failure.) I will insert a noticeable shortcoming. Liz and I ordered the same thing except she got potatoes and I got fruit. Her plate came with an adorable mound of potatoes and a handful of bright whole strawberries. My plate came with a small dish of average fruit cocktail that employed pineapple, cantaloupe, and grapes. I can't say I was over the moon about it but Liz donated a strawberry to my cause and that put me back on the cheerful wagon. The Ahi tuna sandwiches made for some good eye candy: robust steaks of seared tuna, sandwiched between two well grilled slabs of focaccia lined with a layer of arugula. Actually, the focaccia was almost better than the fish. It was grilled so that the interior of the bread offered a nice crunch but the exterior only lightly toasted. It was counter intuitive and I got a big kick out of it. Apparently all others were happy with their orders and for the record the Ramos Fizz is awesome: light, not too sweet, with a gentle dusting of grated nutmeg on top.

If you don't mind dropping a dollar to eat delicious food, (perhaps served by a green, albeit competent staff) amidst some of the most awe-inspiring views of San Francisco, definitely make Sam's a priority. The ferry actually drops you off there-- in case you are motivated to have more than one or two Ramos Fizzes. The one warning I have is about the seagulls; they abound and they aren't scared of you. It is in your best interest to cover your food with a napkin (in the event of a communal dish like chips and guac) and definitely keep your guard up if you are sitting anywhere on the perimeter of the patio.

Sam's, thanks for a very happy Sunday. Bourdain, lay-off the green ones.